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Ouch. Sounds like you're having a tough time max. That sucks. I've been there, so I kinda know what you're talking about. I've been in the ever circling vortex of self doubt, frustration, and loathing. It's no bueno. I know. If you don't mind lemme tell you a couple things. You can read em if you want, read em again later if you feel like it. But honestly man, if I spend all this time typing this out to you and you don't let it be a little tinder for your fire, well, you're just letting us both down. And you don't HAVE to do that. You don't HAVE to do anything. But you get to choose.
(Who am I? My name’s Ryan and I live in Canada. Just moved to a new city for a dream job that I got because of the rules below. I owe a lot of my success to people much cooler, kinder, more loving and greater than me. When I get the chance to maybe let a little bit of help out, it’s a way of thanking them. )
Rule numero uno - There are no more zero days. What's a zero day? A zero day is when you don't do a single fucking thing towards whatever dream or goal or want or whatever that you got going on. No more zeros. I'm not saying you gotta bust an essay out everyday, that's not the point. The point I'm trying to make is that you have to make yourself, promise yourself, that the new SYSTEM you live in is a NON-ZERO system. Didnt' do anything all fucking day and it's 11:58 PM? Write one sentence. One pushup. Read one page of that chapter. One. Because one is non zero. You feel me? When you're in the super vortex of being bummed your pattern of behaviour is keeping the vortex goin, that's what you're used to. Turning into productivity ultimate master of the universe doesn't happen from the vortex. It happens from a massive string of CONSISTENT NON ZEROS. That's rule number one. Do not forget.
La deuxieme regle - yeah i learnt french. its a canadian thing. please excuse the lack of accent graves, but lemme get into rule number 2. BE GRATEFUL TO THE 3 YOU'S. Uh what? 3 me's? That sounds like mumbo jumbo bullshit. News flash, there are three you's homeslice. There's the past you, the present you, and the future you. If you wanna love someone and have someone love you back, you gotta learn to love yourself, and the 3 you's are the key. Be GRATEFUL to the past you for the positive things you've done. And do favours for the future you like you would for your best bro. Feeling like shit today? Stop a second, think of a good decision you made yesterday. Salad and tuna instead of Big Mac? THANK YOU YOUNGER ME. Was yesterday a nonzero day because you wrote 200 words (hey, that's all you could muster)? THANK YOU YOUNGER ME. Saved up some coin over time to buy that sweet thing you wanted? THANK YOU. Second part of the 3 me's is you gotta do your future self a favour, just like you would for your best fucking friend (no best friend? you do now. You got 2. It's future and past you). Tired as hell and can't get off reddit/videogames/interwebs? fuck you present self, this one's for future me, i'm gonna rock out p90x Ab Ripper X for 17 minutes. I'm doing this one for future me. Alarm clock goes off and bed is too comfy? fuck you present self, this one's for my best friend, the future me. I'm up and going for a 5 km run (or 25 meter run, it's gotta be non zero). MAKE SURE YOU THANK YOUR OLD SELF for rocking out at the end of every.single.thing. that makes your life better. The cycle of doing something for someone else (future you) and thanking someone for the good in your life (past you) is key to building gratitude and productivity. Do not doubt me. Over time you should spread the gratitude to others who help you on your path.
Rule number 3- don't worry i'm gonna too long didnt' read this bad boy at the bottom (get a pencil and piece of paper to write it down. seriously. you physically need to scratch marks on paper) FORGIVE YOURSELF. I mean it. Maybe you got all the know-how, money, ability, strength and talent to do whatever is you wanna do. But lets say you still didn't do it. Now you're giving yourself shit for not doing what you need to, to be who you want to. Heads up champion, being dissapointed in yourself causes you to be less productive. Tried your best to have a nonzero day yesterday and it failed? so what. I forgive you previous self. I forgive you. But today? Today is a nonzero masterpiece to the best of my ability for future self. This one's for you future homes. Forgiveness man, use it. I forgive you. Say it out loud.
Last rule. Rule number 4, is the easiest and its three words. exercise and books. that's it. Pretty standard advice but when you exercise daily you actually get smarter. when you exercise you get high from endorphins (thanks body). when you exercise you clear your mind. when you exercise you are doing your future self a huge favour. Exercise is a leg on a three legged stool. Feel me? As for books, almost every fucking thing we've all ever thought of, or felt, or gone through, or wanted, or wanted to know how to do, or whatever, has been figured out by someone else. Get some books max. Post to reddit about not caring about yourself? Good first step! (nonzero day, thanks younger me for typing it out) You know what else you could do? Read 7 habits of highly successful people. Read "emotional intelligence". Read "From good to great". Read “thinking fast and slow”. Read books that will help you understand. Read the bodyweight fitness reddit and incorporate it into your workouts. (how's them pullups coming?) Reading is the fucking warp whistle from Super Mario 3. It gets you to the next level that much faster.
That’s about it man. There’s so much more when it comes to how to turn nonzero days into hugely nonzero days, but that’s not your mission right now. Your mission is nonzero and forgiveness and favours. You got 36 essays due in 24 minutes and its impossible to pull off? Your past self let you down big time, but hey… I forgive you. Do as much as you can in those 24 minutes and then move on.
I hope I helped a little bit max. I could write about this forever, but I promised myself I would go do a 15 minute run while listening to A. Skillz Beats Working Vol. 3. Gotta jet. One last piece of advice though. Regardless of whether or not reading this for the first time helps make your day better, if you wake up tomorrow, and you can’t remember the 4 rules I just laid out, please, please. Read this again.
Have an awesome fucking day ☺
tldr; 1. Nonzero days as much as you can. 2. The three you’s, gratitude and favours. 3. Forgiveness 4. Exercise and books (which is a sneaky way of saying self improvement, both physical, emotional and mental)
Edit: Wow reddit gold? Thanks! No idea what to do with it or whats the deal but many thanks!
Edit2: Someone asked what I meant by "much more when it comes to how to turn nonzero days into hugely nonzero days". The long and short of it is a simple truth, but it's tough to TOTALLY UNDERSTAND AND PRACTICE. It's this: you become what you think. This doesnt mean if I think of a tree, I'll be oakin' it by august. It means that the WAY you think, the THINGS you think of, and the IDEAS YOU HOLD IN YOUR MIND defines the sum total that is you. You procrastinate all the time and got fear and worry goin on for something? You are becoming a procrastinator. You keep thinking about how much you want to run that 5 k race in the spring and finish a champion? Are ya keeping it in mind all the time? Is it something that is defining your ACTIONS and influencing you DECISIONS? If it is, then you're becoming the champion you're dreaming about. Dreaming about it makes it. Think and it shall be. But do not forget that action is thought's son. Thoughts without actions are nothing. Have faith in whatever it is you've steeled your mind to. Have faith and follow through with action.
Ok, Ryan that's a bunch of nice words n shit, but how does that help me turn slightly nonzero days into hugely nonzero days. Do you believe all these words you just read? Does it makes sense to you that you BECOME WHAT YOU THINK OF? Ask yourself: What do I think of? When you get home and walk in the door. (how quickly did you turn that laptop on? Did turning it on make you closer to your dreams? What would?) At the bus stop. Lunch break. What direction are you focusing your intentions on? If you're like I was a few years ago, the answer was either No direction, or whatever caught my eye at the moment. But no stress, forgive yourself. You know the truth now. And knowing the truth means you can watch your habits, read books on how you think and act, and finally start changing your behaviour. Heres an example: Feeling like bunk cause you had zero days or barely nonzero days? THINK ABOUT WHAT YOURE DOING. and change just a little bit more. in whatever positive direction you are choosing to go.
Edit3: WHOA! This blew up! Major appreciation to Modified_Duck for making this cool ass image: http://i.imgur.com/7xsp7hJ.png
Edit4: Another AMAZING DESKTOP BACKGROUND! http://www.reddit.com/r/GetMotivated/comments/1rowpb/i_made_a_wallpaper_from_uryans01s_amazing_quote/
Right out of highschool I moved away to another state for college. I had a lot of ambitions for my undergrad years and was already dreaming up which medical schools I wanted to go to. I didn't move in to a dorm though, I moved to an apartment and had to get a job to support myself, which seemed like a better deal than the arm and leg it was going to cost me to live at school (out of state fees are unkind). In retrospect I had all the means to accomplish my goals, really. But through my inexperience I made a lot of poor decisions. That, combined with poor self esteem, the looming worry that I would fail everyone's expectations back home, and the total feeling of isolation I had (most of the 'friends' I had didnt seem to genuinely care about me, and nothing feels worse than being sorrounded by people and feeling utterly alone) just threw me in a spiraling depression that took me a very long time to claw my way out of. I've since met many wonderful people that have helped me better my life again. But the cycle of lethargy I've fallen into left me missing who I was before I came out here, and angry at myself for letting things go how they did. All I have to show for everything now is a dead end job in food service. What you wrote left me on the verge of tears... so thank you. Really. Thank you so much. This ended being a lot longer than I intended it to be, sorry about that. I'm going to get off my ass now and have the first non-zero day I've had in a very, very long time.
Edit : I came back from work to this. ;__; I want to say thank you to everybody who messaged me or replied to this post offering your stories, your advice, and to the wonderful soul that gilded my post! You people are amazing, I really mean that. I've never been so inspired, or filled with so much hope about my future as I have been after today.
Dude, thank you so much. It's been a tough life, and the past three years of my life have literally just been me doing nothing and having moments of motivation that were quickly shut down by myself. I could easily throw the blame on others, but in the end I have always known it was my own doing. This way of thinking has just made it so, so much worse.
I have very few friends left nowadays, most of them sticking around simply because they have known me so long. I let most of them drift away because I didn't think I was worthy. I didn't think I was worthy of anything, I mean shit, I couldn't even muster up a fuck to give to myself. I certainly wasn't expecting anyone else to.
I was even too scared to come on to reddit for help. I was scared that somehow admitting it, made it all that more real. But it is real, and it's something I need to fix. It's something I need to get over and become a better person from. So thank you, if I could afford gold I would give it to you in a heartbeat, but for now this is all I have. I hope you achieve all that you can man.
Reading is the fucking warp whistle from Super Mario 3. It gets you to the next level that much faster.
You're a legend.
Thanks! I started doing agriculture and land clearing for exercise and reading about carpentry and masonry in my spare time recently.
I like your 3 yous rule and will try it. I dont have zero days anymore, I am always thankful and grateful to everyone around me, why not me?
As to the OP it sounds like ADD and a dose of depression, ADD is a huge bucket of fuck it. And as an adult a constant case of the fuckits makes you feel awful.
Because of society and because lazy. The nonzero rule is hard to follow but it does work. Without medication. I built a largish greenhouse from scratch to see if I could. And now I dont have fuckits anymore.
Thanks for this.. Goddamn I needed to hear this too. I fucking love the non-zero system idea.. I've not seen or heard this before but I'm gonna use this now - cheers.
I made you, and anyone who wants to print it out, this. Thank you for being awesome.
Thank you for this post. You've had a life changing impact on me. For the first time in a very long time I know I'm not going to lay in bed tonight staring at the ceiling wondering why I bother going on living. Seriously, thank you.
A thousand thank-yous for this. I'm on my way up and out of what OP is describing, and your rules and comments will help me tremendously.
I'm going to try re-writing that with a bit less fluff, and a bit more consistency [modifications appreciated]. There are four rules:
There are no more zero days [something, anything, is better than nothing]
Be grateful to the three "you"s [past, present and future you]
Forgive yourself [appreciate past efforts, even without actions]
Exercise and books [a double-dose of intelligence and reinforcement]
There are no more zero days. What's a zero day? A zero day is when you don't do a single thing towards whatever dream or goal or want or whatever that you got going on. Didnt' do anything all day and it's 11:58 PM? Write one sentence. One pushup. Read one page of that chapter. One. Because one is non zero. When you're in the super vortex of being bummed your pattern of behaviour is keeping the vortex going; that's what you're used to. Turning into productivity ultimate master of the universe doesn't happen from the vortex. It happens from a massive string of *consistent' non-zeroes.
Be grateful to the three "you"s. There's the past you, the present you, and the future you. If you wanna love someone and have someone love you back, you gotta learn to love yourself, and the 3 "you"s are the key. Be grateful to the past you for the positive things you've done. And do favours for the future you like you would for your best friend. Feeling like shit today? Stop a second, think of a good decision you made yesterday. Salad and tuna instead of Big Mac? Thank you, younger me. Was yesterday a nonzero day because you wrote 200 words? Thank you, younger me. Saved up some coin over time to buy that sweet thing you wanted? Thank you. Second part of the 3 "me"s is you gotta do your future self a favour, just like you would for your best friend. Alarm clock goes off and bed is too comfy? Fuck you present self, this one's for my best friend, the future me; I'm up and going for a 25 meter run. Make sure you than your old self for rocking out at the end of every single thing. That makes your life better. The cycle of doing something for someone else (future you) and thanking someone for the good in your life (past you) is key to building gratitude and productivity. Over time you should spread the gratitude to others who help you on your path.
Forgive yourself. Being dissapointed in yourself causes you to be less productive. Maybe you got all the know-how, money, ability, strength and talent to do whatever is you wanna do, but you still didn't do it. Now you're giving yourself shit for not doing what you need to do in order to be who you want to be. I forgive you, younger me. Tried your best to have a nonzero day yesterday and it failed? so what. I Forgive you, younger me. Today is a nonzero masterpiece to the best of my ability for future self. I forgive you. Say it out loud.
Exercise and books. When you exercise daily you get smarter. When you exercise you get high from endorphins. When you exercise you clear your mind. When you exercise you are doing your future self a huge favour. As for books, almost everything we've all ever thought of, or felt, or gone through, or wanted, or wanted to know how to do, has been figured out by someone else. Read books that will help you understand. Reading is the fucking warp whistle from Super Mario 3. It gets you to the next level that much faster.
Man, you seriously need to write this up and copywriter it! The nonzero days is pure genius! All four rules are a great way to break out of a down cycle and get you where you want to be. Thanks you are truly a wonderful person!
If I could add one rule that has been incredibly helpful to me: NEVER break a promise to yourself. If a friend constantly breaks promises to you it will destroy your trust. The same holds true for your relationship with yourself.
If you get on the treadmill for a half hour then jog for a half hour. If you say you're going to get up at 8, get up at 8. Anything you tell yourself you're going to do, you MUST do. You don't have to do everything perfectly, but you have to do it. Your brain will complain like hell at first because you've spent your whole life training it to expect failure. You're addicted to failure like an alcoholic is addicted to alcohol, and like any addict the key is to retrain your brain so it eventually accepts that it can't get what it wants, which is almost always the easiest way out of any situation, be that getting drunk or sleeping in.
Here's the beautiful thing...if you do this your brain will eventually STOP COMPLAINING!! You don't mind doing hard things because your brain knows it can't win.
So...never break a promise to yourself. It will change you life.
Edit: Make sure you set reasonable goals for yourself. Don't step on the stairmaster for the first time expecting to march for an hour. That's not fair to yourself. Start small and work your way up. For example, I have a promise to myself to eat well, but part of that promise includes occasional cheat days because having that flexibility improves my quality of life.
I have a set up a sub that is close to what happened here. It is called r/HelpMeThinkLikeA ... and is for getting the pro insight into how to solve problems, situations and other things. This is a shamless promotion, but the sub is made in exactly the spirit that /u/ryans01 shows here. Help in how to think or how to envision a situation. It was inspired by another /u/bestof'd thread where "/u/Kristler helps user think like a programmer instead of doing his homework for him". I hope y'all can firgive me plugging the sub here. but the idea is good, and needs to be seen, THANKS!
Well sir, that's some of the best advice I've seen on this site. Give your past self a pat on the back. :)
Hey guys, I made a new sub dedicated to r/NonZeroDay
A community where we can share our Non Zero Days and support each other into being more productive! I hope you guys help it grow!
Cheers!
I'm gonna thank past me for procrastinating on reddit because of this!
i just ran across this post via another; this is excellent advice, ryan. you hit on a lot of points that tie back to ancient tradition and mythology, which remain in our consciousness over millennia for one reason: they are true.
i think you should consider publishing an essay with these pearls... given the tremendous feedback, you've clearly hit a nerve.
based on my own experience, i would add one other thesis: ‘zero negative’. the idea being that when one’s mind wanders into negative thinking ―about oneself, others, world events― realize and circumvent that thougt stream as quickly as possible and switch it off by reaffirming that we all have our ups and downs, our own good side and bad; that’s core to the human condition, so we shouldn't dwell on past mistakes; we can only try to do better right now... 'be your own hero'. this goes back to your point on self-forgiveness, and forgiveness of others, which is crucial.
the difference this action can make is profound… rather than dwelling in regret and self-loathing, focus on what is good, and what positive actions we can take going forward. in forming this habit, we can immediately redirect our energy from negative to positive in the moment. over time, this will result in huge positive gains, not only for ourselves, but also in the grand scheme. as the buddhists say, ‘enlightenment comes one mind at a time.’ quantum physics also affirms this possibility… reality is a strange trip.
thanks again for the post… i’m sure you’ve had a very positive impact on many people, and there is probably no greater gift we can give.
Wow Ryan thanks man, having lost 45 lbs. with 30 more Togo and having started college for the first time ever, this is truly an inspiration to keep going, an inspiration to rewrite your brains thought process. To take the negative energy and turn it into positive. For me sometimes all it takes is a good small word to change. It did with my weight loss and it did with starting college. All it took was one person giving a small word of encouragement! Have a great day yourself man.
Wow. This makes a lot of sense. I always wondered why I got more bummed out during weekends and holidays than during the week.
Former (may be at present too) depressive here, THIS ARE THE RULES WHICH GOT ME OUT, THEY ARE BASED ON SOLID PSYCHOLOGICAL PRINCIPLES, he "really" knows what he's saying. I would say even if you can start with one rule and incorporate one every week that would be a great great start :) All the best OP, please reply since this guy has put so much effort in writing it.
Ryan, Thanks dude, it's people like you who kindle the spirit of support and undeniable faith in whole of mankind. Please keep up the good writing.
That no zero days thing is great advice and a fantastic stepping stone.
Awesome, man.
I know this is ancient, but damn Ryan, thank you! I saved and reread this comment a million times & it's truly helped me. Past, present & future me all owe you for helping me get my life together. You helped me more than you'll ever know!
hugs Wanted to say that the past/present/future self thing really helped me. So thanks.
Been lurking reddit for over a year, barely made an account a few days ago and had to reply to this to save.
I really needed to read this since I've been really down on myself, inspired me to put on my running shoes and go for walk instead of just laying in bed for 2hrs before having to get up and get ready for work. Thanks!
Ryan, thank you for taking the type to write out all of this. I've been having trouble getting through my thesis, but you're right, no more zero days. Thank you!
This is probably the only reason I got out of bed today. Thank you.
This is the single most inspirational and helpful comment I I've ever read on reddit. Thank you Ryan (also my name) for taking the time to share this bit of wisdom. I needed this. I've always known thoughts define me, but still find myself thinking negatively and pessimistically. I think your comment was the tipping point I needed to continue to improve. Thanks bud. Really.
There’s so much more when it comes to how to turn nonzero days into hugely nonzero days,
To someone who's mission is currently that, what other things would you have to say? (since you said that you had much to say about it)
So far I'm managing to never have any zero days, but it happens too often that they are just that; nonzero days, instead of hugely nonzero days
![Cake day](data:image/svg+xml,<svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="80" height="80"><rect fill-opacity="0"/></svg>)
I hope that your new job is as a lifecoach. Because this is just awesome!
That was beautiful, and definitely advice I've gotta follow myself. Thank you so much for sharing this!!
Wow. Yeah, consistent zeroes is the enemy. Today you're thinking it's okay to do nothing because it's just one day. Then you do nothing tomorrow. Then you do nothing forever. I love you, Yoda. Marry me before I get off reddit and do what you just hypertyped. I'm not asking.
After reading this I wrote down every single thing I wanted to learn for the rest of my life. Put them on a calender site called 42tasks. Researched how and where I could learn them all
Then had 11 straight zero days, ?_?
I could have easily acquired one completely new skill or talent with those 50 odd hours. Instead of looking back at how much of a failure that is, I am looking back at just how quickly and easy it really is. In just 11 days I could have learned a shit ton. 11 days from now I could do the same.
I have also come to express my gratitude. It's easy for me to feel aimless in this big crazy world, but you have reminded me that I am the master of my own destiny. In order to be so, I must venture into the scary world of positive integers.
Figured I'd respond with my real account. I read this 5 days ago and like most people I read things, say I'll do something about them and then forget about it entirely. Somehow the words 'Non-zero day' stuck with me and 'thank your past self'. Over the last 4 days I have started to do this and it has started to help me too. Thank you for posting this.
Edit: Gave my first reddit gold to you.
Thank you, Ryan. Thank you. Thank you.
From your comment history, I see that you haven't been around for some time. You're probably not going to read this anytime soon, if ever. That's okay, though. I'll be the first to admit the selfishness of this particular outpouring of words: It's more for me than for you, but I feel as though, since you helped bring it about, you deserve to know the change you've affected in me.
The whole time when I was reading this, I was thinking about my situation, how this whole past semester was all zero days, how I had a freaking full ride to my university of choice, and now I'm probably going to fail a class and get the scholarship revoked, which will mean having to drop out of that university. And all because I got too complacent, took too much for granted, was an idiot all the way.
And I find it easy enough to forgive Past Me, which makes me mad, because I shouldn't be able to forgive myself that easily; this is all my fault. But I can move on and forgive myself, and after reading this, I can try to look for something for which to thank Past Me.
But mostly, even though hope is scant and the chances of everything falling on my head are high, even though these next few months are going to be terrible, and everyone I care about will be disappointed in me, even through all that, I think I can make it out okay if I just stick to this:
Maybe you got all the know-how, money, ability, strength and talent to do whatever is you wanna do. But lets say you still didn't do it. Now you're giving yourself shit for not doing what you need to, to be who you want to. Heads up champion, being dissapointed in yourself causes you to be less productive. Tried your best to have a nonzero day yesterday and it failed? so what. I forgive you previous self. I forgive you. But today? Today is a nonzero masterpiece to the best of my ability for future self. This one's for you future homes. Forgiveness man, use it. I forgive you. Say it out loud.
All for Future Me. That's all it ever really is. I've been letting him down way too much, these past few months. He's probably going to be severely ticked off at me when I become Past Me and he becomes Present. And it's too late to change, and right now, I'm living on borrowed time, and sooner or later, it'll all come to a head, and I'll very likely be worse off for it. But with this, I may just be able to get through it all--and that will be worth it. So thank you.
Now, if you'll excuse me: I spent the whole day sleeping in and wasting time; I have an Astro exam to study for, and an English portfolio to finish. Not exactly 36 essays in 24 minutes, and they probably won't make much difference, as they're not even the class I'm failing. But they're all I have control over now, and I won't let that become a zero. Never again.
So once again (because I'm bad with endings), thank you. You very probably prevented me from doing something stupidly permanent, and for that, you have my eternal gratitude. I hope to be able to return to you after this is all over, and tell you about how it all went, and how much your words helped me.
And until then, I wish you the best of days, all of them nonzero.
Hey Ryan, fellow Canadian here. That was probably the best thing I have ever read on Reddit and I've been here for years. You made me realize that during all those shit days of past me, they were still nonzero days and they still matter. That way I can move onto forgiveness and advance from that. Thank you so much. I hope as many people can read this as possible.
Printing this out and taping it to the bathroom door. No more zero days. Thank you, Ryan!
I know I am very late to this, but dude, you are a great person. I can just tell by the way you speak and talk. I am not sure if you know this(probably), but you will be the person that many remember later in life as their hero. I just want to meet you or someone like you because my god you understand life and motivation. I hope its not weird that I am praising you, but I want you know that all of these people and me think you are something special and we will use these rules to better ourselves. Thank you so much, I genuinely mean it.
I know this has gotten a lot of attention already, and it's getting kind of old, but I just found this (and this sub) through a link someone posted in the Arnold AMA.
I've been trying to change my life and get more disciplined and focused on my goals, and I've heard the concept of nonzero days and that sort of thing, but man, this post brought tears to my eyes.
I've always had trouble forgiving myself, and the second and third rules were really great for me. I needed to read this.
I wish I could give you a hug.
Thanks, Ryan
I've read this multiple times, shared with plenty of friends/coworkers and it is pure gold. Thank you!
Thanks for writing this out! It's helping me a lot to break my bad habits and actually get motivated to do my university work. This may have changed me for the better :)
Saving this for whenever future me needs to see it again.
Disregard this comment
Hey so looks like this subreddit is opening up replies on old threads so heads up you might start getting more replies here again!
I still send people to this as I think its still arguably the best bit of self help and motivational stuff on this website
If i become something, me and my all tenses ( past present and the future thank you )
if I dont become something, me and my all tenses ( past present and the future thank you )
Holy shit dude. Thank you so much. Not OP but I definitely am glad that I was able to read that. Thanks for taking the time to type it out.
You talk like an animal crossing character would, with wisdom to match!
So I’m here 8 years late to this post and Ryan’s reply. Have you guys heard that coincidences do not exist? This reply is exactly what I’ve been doing since the past 4 weeks or so; the difference is that I hadn’t heard about this concept of Non zero days.
Disclosure: I will mention medical treatment I’m receiving and I’m not advising anyone about any med treatment; this is just me sharing my two cents.
I’ve been pulling myself out of a deep well of depression and anxiety for the past four years and I had been having pretty awful bout of depression for the past six months. I’ve been receiving psychological for the past 2 years and psychiatric treatment on and off; I was in denial of taking meds and I’ve started and drop them several times against my doctors advice.
But recently with the last bout depression I sensed it was hitting me hard it was overwhelming and I got really scared of myself and between all of that fog I only knew one thing: I wanted to feel better, I wanted to do better for myself I just couldn’t see a way out or a path. But I knew I needed some help. I did know that I was taking bad decisions every day and this is where I think the non zero days apply to my story. I was smoking weed every day; smoking one pack of cigarettes every 2 days and having impulsive binge eating. I was not exercising. I was just existing. But in that deep well of self loathing and self destitution I knew… I KNEW that I wanted to feel better and to do better for myself. So one day I decided to help myself taking better decisions and I don’t know what clicked but something did and I suddenly saw it as clear as water: all of these ugly habits are just decisions. Tiny decisions that I make everyday. And one day I told my self: today you are going to make one tiny positive decision for yourself. That day instead of eating a pizza by myself I decided I was going to eat something from my fridge and I prepared a meal.
4 or so weeks later I’ve stopped smoking cigarettes and weed completely; I’m now following a healthy diet and going out for a daily 30 min walk. I’m constantly thinking about tiny positive decisions. But don’t get me wrong I know this is a process and it’s a constant work but at the end it can be as simple as a tiny good decision.
Or like Ryan said a Non zero day. My tiny good decisions is my non zero day method. Today I went to my follow up psychiatric consult and basically what Ryan wrote it’s the same thing I told my doctor I’ve been doing. Slowly but surely.
Hello :) I've been in a good flow in the past but once I get things going I want more and often it becomes too much for me and then I collapse and have to start over. I've never managed to keep things going long term from my own innitiative. I can do it when I have a structure (as long as it's not too much and burns me out) but I haven't been able to do it on my own I've been trying and hoping that something changes at some point but it hasn't. This has been very demotivating. I do have autism which makes some things more difficult but I don't want to use that as an excuse, I was doing better in the past. I didn't get far in the past but my lifestyle was better I had more energy and was doing stuff. Any advice is welcome. :)
Do you have a blog or website to follow you on? You really should start your own thing.
Thank you so much for all of this! I think I can make good use of it as well. My question is do you have advice for those of us who have yet to figure out our goals?
ladeeda, replying so I can find this again in the future. I've fumbled my way through parts of rules 2, 3, and 4, but seeing them laid out is magnificent and holy shit rule 1 is genius, genius!
One thing that helped me is thinking of alle the time I waste and find something which is more fun, but not necessarily related to the reason I procrastinate a lot, an replace my wasted time doing this new thing. It is easier to replace habits bit by bit than to change everything over night. That shit doesn't work for me.
Thanks for posting this. I read it because your comment was on the best of list. I didn't even know this subreddit existed, but this is just what I needed to read this morning. You may have helped a lot of strangers out more than you'll ever know. Thank you.
This sir is brilliant. Since going through some stuff I've tried to implement this but it's nice to put a sticky name and method to it. I also recommend the Power of Habit big time. It was the first book that got me on this path.
My God. Yesterday I told myself that throughout the next week I would do all the shit I wanted to do plus more towards achieving my goals, but I knew it wouldn't happen. I read this, saved it to a text document and put it on my desktop. Right in the centre. So that every day I can read this and be inspired to do what I want to do. thanks man!
I think I fell in love with you purely based on this post.
Wow. I love it. Seriously, I'm going to print this shit out and pass it out to everyone. Awesome.
I want to share this with every one of my struggling friends and carry it around in my pocket to read when I'm low. Thank you!
Thank you for this. I've been telling myself all day that I needed to get up and do something, but I haven't. I don't have non-zero days, but just not-as-productive-as-I'd-like days. Your concept of doing things as gifts speaks to me in ways I actually understand. I would move the world for a friend, but not for myself. Instead of thinking of these things as "stuff I have to do," I will now think of them as "stuff I'm doing for future seerae" and "thanks, past seerae, for doing that for me yesterday." Love it. You are brilliant. I wish I could give you a more thought-out thank you, but I've got to make future seerae a study guide for my anatomy test next week.
I have no idea how long ago this was posted, but it's amazing. I've been dealing with depression for about 2 months now and as soon as I post this I'm going to write down your rules and tape them by my bed. Thank you so much for this, I hope you see this and know you totally helped me out already. If I knew how to give Gold you'd be getting it again!
Wow, late to the party, but still gotta weigh in on your wise words, delicately peppered with foreign language and references to awesome, nostalgic video games. Thank you for this, Sir. It has immeasurably brightened my day.
You glorious bastard. I read this on the couch, half-heartedly watching tv. I got up, wrote down some goals, put them in a safe, then hit the gym for the first time in over a year.
I pushed through the blortch and ran 3.21 miles.
If I had more money, I'd contribute to your pile of gold. Just know that you've made a difference already.
(no best friend? you do now. You got 2. It's future and past you)
I've been never found the whole "Do it for yourself" to be terribly motivating for some reason, I couldn't improve myself for other people nor myself and I have zero non-work friends.
The above quote just smacked me across the face and gave me a small bit of understanding. I DO have friends, Future Me and Past Me. I love them so fucking much I AM willing to put in the effort to help my mate Future Me out and I'd like to thank Past Me for all the little things that helped Present Me help Future Me.
This is the most amazing thing I've ever had the chance to read on Reddit. I got screwed bad by two jobs, and went through some shit the last year and I've felt beaten. This really gave me more motivation to keep on pushing to get things back to awesome.
Thank you.
I'm a teacher and I just I straight stole this post, censored it up, changed the spelling of "favor," and put it into a class that every new student will be going through at my school. Fantastic advice - and the picture is a perfect tl;dr for the lazy students, /u/Modified_Duck Awesome awesome awesome.
Im so glad i found this again. I read it when you first posted but forgot to save it. Im so glad i found it again. Thanks man. This helped.
I just wanted to come back and tell you that this comment made a huge change for me. The whole "nonzero" idea is now ingrained in my head. I've gone to the gym every day this week and plan to continue, because I was stuck in this self-loathing rut and just feeling crappy and stupid about myself...haven't lost the baby weight and my son's 15 months old, that kind of thing. So I decided to make the changes in my life to just take things a step at a time, forgive myself for the past, and move FORWARD instead of back. So thank you.
It's two months later but I'm damn glad I found this. I'm going through a rough time like OP and many other commenters and your post spoke volumes. From the core of my being, thank you ryans01. I'm new to this subreddit and subscribed in hopes of improving myself. When I checked the top posts on this subreddit I was a bit surprised OPs post but when I scrolled down and saw all that gold for your post I knew I had to read it. I'm glad I did because you, sir, deserve all that gold and more. So I'm posting here to bookmark your post and to say thank you. Your post was just what I needed - from the rules you mentioned and to the way you said it. You're the bro I needed. :)
I saved this comment when it was bestof'd, and never looked at it again until now (it's in the top 10 saved comments list on today's reddit blog). Until January, I'd been having zero days and I couldn't get out of the rut. Then one of my friends made a facebook group: a challenge to create one thing every week, just one, whether it's a drawing, poem, crochet or knit, sewing, cooking, or what. Just make something, and post a photo of it once a week. It's an open group, and the spiderweb of people joining and inviting others to join has expanded nearly exponentially.
The feeling of accountability to all these people, most of whom I don't know in the least, keeps me posting. I've crocheted more things in the past two months than in the two years before. I've been a day or two late a few times, but I've done it, and my zero days are down to fewer than 10.
Now that I've demonstrated to myself that I can stick to something for longer than a few weeks, my husband and I are going to add yoga to the mix. We'll see how it goes, but this time, I actually have high hopes!
Im guessing Max chose not to turn his life around, most of his comment history is about porn
Hi Ryan. I know I'm way late to this party. But I don't have anything great to say other than thank you for this. The nonzero day just, fits. Idk. Just thank you for saying what you've said here.
Sorry for the notification. Friend linked me to this after I told him about my procrastination problem, and I'm just commenting for reference.
WAIT YOU CAN SAVE COMMENTS REDDIT IS TOTALLY DIFFERENT FROM IMGUR HELL YES
Hands down, best comment I've ever seen on Reddit. Positive, motivational, and entertaining. Working on my own warp whistle from Super Mario Bros. 3.
You totally deserve all that gold, tnx for this. :D
Hell, I know this is really late as a response, but thank you for posting that. I ran across a link to this fucking masterpiece of advice.
Seriously, it's so damn simple! I'm going to try and share this with everyone I run across on Reddit.
You've made my day with this. Thank you.
Thanks for the post,
It's funny how I find i already knew all of this at some level, but to actually have it materialized DIRECTLY infront of me is a massive help.
All of these things I have at one stage or another had moments of epiphany where I understand these concepts but now to have them sealed up in hard text so they can't escape me in times of doubt is a tool I have to thank you for.
I guess positivity comes back around right, Seems that way for you on this one :)
Awesome. I already do most of this naturtally. Not an avid reader of books, but I gather tons of info and ideas straight from the net. I'm fairly successful, and I drive myself continually to improve. Knowledge is the key to understanding, and I feel that I understand a LOT. Not the smartest guy in the world, but I'm not afraid to try almost anything. If I find something that interests me, I research it, and many times build it. (I'm a fabricator of many things) I may never use it, or truly have a need, but I just do it. Knowing that I can do it, is the most rewarding thing for me.
Good advice! Just commenting so I can come back and read it when I feel like a piece of shit.
I just read this today and it is some life changing stuff man. Thank you. I'm off to write.
Replying so I can find this. Going through the same situation. Hopefully I can read this everyday
Excellent advice (thank you past me for commenting on this to save it for future me.)
Wow! Best thing I've read in a while. Truly inspiring words. Thank you for taking time and making many people's day a lot better. You fucking rock!
I dont know who you are but I like you! May i suggest you write a motivational book. Your thoughts could help so many more people. If you do let me know I will be there to buy the first copy : )
This made me think of that saying: I've got 3 people to keep an eye on today Me, Myself, and I
I'm totally writing those four rules down and keeping them around me at all times. Some really good advice man, thank you for writing it out, it's really going to help me!
I love the whole thing but this was my favorite sentence: "when you exercise you get high from endorphins (thanks body)." Going to follow that advice.
Replying to save for myself for later. Amazing advice man! I've been stuck in a rut as of late, and thanks to you, I'm finally going to ikea and getting a bookshelf to start organizing my apartment and take more ownership over it!
Wow, you just convinced me to run three miles, in Las Vegas, at eight in the morning, with a pretty substantial hangover. You need your own tv show.
A quarter of the way through your comment I'm out of bed headed to the gym.
Thank you for writing that down man. I am going through a particularly bad phase of continuous zero days and your post is going to help. I am going to save it and read it every day till it sticks. Thanks again.
Someone has read a N. Hill's book and never mentioned it by the title :-)
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